Why men have affairs?
Speak about a loaded matter that no one wants to speak about, that’s it. Amusing thing, affairs have been going on ever since ancient times. Extramarital relationships can be burdened with troubles, cause sadness, and other harms. Also you should wrap your brain around all the other issues, there’s that truth and frankness issue, finances, age difference, religious education, guilt, and on and on. I anticipate there will be some strong opinions about some of this.
For the intention of this article I should identify an affair as a long term, maybe decades long relationship of a sexual nature between two people of whom one or both are married to other persons, dating married men.
Why do people have affairs? There are as many answers as there are men seeking an affair. I am sure mainly though it is just the human nature, the need for affection, belonging, to be wanted and cared for, the caring for others and wanting to be loved and loved. Here are a several reasons I have run across.
Biologically we as humans are all sexual creatures. Nature has us set up to reproduce, to have sex. Sex is pleasurable and fun, and sex makes us flee the world for a short period of time. This euphoria exists for whatever amount of time we are able to keep the adrenalin levels high enough. Some people are able to turn the desire on and off, some are brilliant at controlling it and others are so-so at best. Though we all have it, young and mature, able bodied and not so able. It is the Human condition. For some of us it is the sex act itself that drives us. For some of us it is the exhilaration of the pursue. For some of us it is the seduction, for some it is the love for another individual, for some it is the desire to be appreciatedloved, for some it is the whole romance thing. These wishes and yearnings can be so strong they rise above the taboos humanity has erected against extramarital affairs. For lots of individuals the yearnings will overcome their fears and make them risk the wrath of not only their relatives, but the public also. So why, what is the mechanism?
Sex Addicts, possibly some of us are. Sex is terribly good, better then drugs, a natural high. If you are in this group of biologically driven sex addicts and can find away to have sex and not hurt your family or anyone else? You will need to minimize the hazard you are taking. If you have the feeling that a good affair is one that is beneficial to everyone, then good luck.
No love at home, or no romance. I suppose this is the largest grouping, huge truly. There are many couples whose marital relationships is over, except they feel comfortable in the manner they exist, and upsetting the extended families is not on their list of things they wish to do. You love your other half but there is no romance. Then there are the kids to consider. Your savings are so entangled. You need the medical insurance, and so on. There are a lot of reasons to live as a family besides love and sex.
Physical reasons, there are some people who can not have sex. They have physical circumstances that prevent them completing the sex performance, at least not with their othere half. An extramarital affair from time to time solves the trouble while keeping the marriage undamaged.
Neglect, sorrowfully this is a ordinary groung I fear. One or the other, as a rule the man is sexually neglecting his female for a tones of reasons. As a male I really am grateful to you guys neglecting your girls and making them accessible to us men of romance, making them “lonely wives” Though I still think it is despicable that you are neglectful. Then there is the spouse who is neglectful until the wife or husband has an affair, then they condemn them for doing so, when they where the catalyst. Those who neglect, then condemn, are not only neglectful, but malevolent.
Something is just omitted in the marriage, I can not put my finger on it, but its not there. Probably its romance that is missing, maybe it is a shortage of love, could be caring is gone, maybe it is the closeness, maybe neglect. Maybe we have simply developed apart, our common interests diverged. Could be it is that what I want, and what I want to do the rest of my ages, is opposite of what you want. Could be I simply do not know what I want from the marriage anymore. Maybe, just maybe I miss that feeling that when I am with you, it just feels right.
The major reason people give is, they search for the passion that is missing and so very much longed for.
There are other reasons, the feeling of power, to get away, for financial gain, for payback and so on. I am sure there are more reasons why people have affairs then these. I only stop because if this gets too long no one will read it.
Tags: affairs, Dating, dating married people, extramarital affairs, Marriage, married dating, seeking an affair